I used to work with a guy who would say the same thing every day “today is a good day”. I agree. Every day is a great day because every day we have more time to steer the course towards our destiny.

Since today is a great day, it’s the perfect day to share ONE of my love stories with you. What? Yes, I have several love stories: I love my life, I love my family, I love my friends, I love DH, I love my momma, I love technology, I love gadgets, I love music (especially reggae and latin), I love plantains, I love pistachios, and there are tons of other things I could tell you a story about. But today, I’d like to tell you about how I learned to love my destiny because I didn’t always instinctively KNOW that in order to love anything or anyone else, I had to love myself first.

I don’t really remember much up to age 8 but between 8-14 years old, I hated my hair, hated where I lived, hated my school, hated my lanky limbs, and I hated ballet lessons and swim classes.

Between 16-20 years old I hated where I lived and missed where I used to live. I hated the new school and missed the old school. I started loving the body I was in and realized that not everybody could swim so I loved that I could.

Through the ages of 21-25 I hated my job and many of the people around me. From 26-29 the harsh feelings extended once again to the body I lived in primarily because my reproductive system would not cooperate with the destiny I was ‘supposed’ to have. In that time, I discovered gadgets and technology and list making and the military and structure and traveling and a new guy in my life and I fell in love!

I still hated the body I lived in but in the summer of 2006 I was relieved of that misery when my body decided to cooperate and not just one, but TWO fetuses blossomed with a due date of February 14th, 2007….THE LOVE DAY!!! Alright, destiny is coming to meet me. Then, without warning, they were gone. I instantly moved past hate and actually despised my body and my life. Ohhhhh the torture of talking to people, of looking at pregnant women, of going to the store, of giving a damn.

It took a looooonnnnnngggggg time to get my $%&@ together and quit making everyone around me miserable. It was such an unhinged time for all of us that even now, on the 14th of every February, my family and friends still question whether or not I’m “okay”.

Hell, not only am I OKAY, I am LOVING my life and everything I have the opportunity to do while I HAVE LIFE!

What changed? I learned to love myself, love my skills, love my purpose, love my skin, love my hair, embrace where I live….let’s not get it twisted, I lived in North Dakota recently and there’s just nothing there for me to ‘love’ but it served a crucial role in my journey. The time I spent in North Dakota was full of self-discovery and charting my own destiny. THAT is how you love your destiny….by creating it.

You get all into what you are passionate about. You amplify your skills and combine them with that passion to create a life you will want to live and want to love. You are present and attentive to the things and people that bring you joy. You carve out time to focus on what makes you smile and what makes you tick. You focus on what you ARE able to do and not what you will never be able to do. You design your destiny.

I no longer ‘hate’ anything, anyone or any situation. That’s not to say it’s all roses and teddy bears however, my every action, every thought, and every decision is done in love and with love. Every day I am designing the destiny I am in love with.

Dear Destiny,
I love you.