Intention, not just curiosity. This is how I now use this word. We all learn this word during the verrrryyyyyy early stages of our development. There are often stories of children driving their parents crazy with never-ending whys born out of curiosity. That doesn’t change much as we grow and learn and develop. We mostly use the word to satisfy our curiosity. But, what if we used the word to help us deliberately define our purpose and our goals?
I found 2 FANTASTIC tools to help me build SYBECA Services. I will tell you about the other soon, but today I want to mention Christy Wright from Business Boutique (links below). If you’re in business or you want to be intentional about your life, then you MUST check her out. The day I listened to her podcast about ‘knowing your why’ felt like a rebirth. Yeah, I can be descriptively (yep, just made it up) dramatic sometimes but I’m really serious! I felt like that little bud of green you see on TV pushing through the earth during spring. I came right through, POP! Oh, this is probably a good time to mention that Christy Wright has no idea who I am and therefore there has been no compensation for my thoughts.
Now listen, I’ve started businesses before, and explored a gazillion ideas with my hubby, my momma, and my friends. None of them flourished the way I wanted them to, and I cannot say for sure that it’s because I didn’t focus on my why, but I dang sure believe it will be a game changer now. But it’s not just in business. I was at the perfect point in my personal life to ‘meet’ Christy Wright. Starting in early 2015 I adopted a new personal mantra – I am not doing “it” if: it doesn’t interest me, it doesn’t make me happy, or it doesn’t improve my life. Period. Without knowing all the current buzzwords, I had decided to live my life with intention. I had started to define my why.
I’ve had the range of responses to my mantra: good for you, what?, are you serious?, that’s selfish, that’s harsh etc. etc. It doesn’t matter. If you haven’t figured out yet that it is PERFECTLY FINE to be selfish then you are wasting time! In fact, if you don’t have people in your life encouraging you to be selfish then you should get some. I am guilty of constantly repeating one of the new buzzwords “selfcare”. Newsflash! Selfcare and being selfish are synonymous when it relates to taking care of you and when it relates to being the best you. If I don’t purposefully take the time to work towards the best me, then what exactly am I offering and sharing as a wife, daughter, friend, neighbor, workout partner, colleague, entrepreneur? Do you want a crappy version of me? How do you know which version of me you’ll get? Will the version of me that you get be useful to you? Will you want that version in your life/around you? Are you content with a small percentage of my performance? What if you’re getting 15%? Yikes! Those are terrible odds in my opinion BUT, if it works for you then go for it. It took me a loooooooonnnnnnnggggggg time to wake up, push through the earth and know that I don’t want those odds.
In the same way that I want to be the best version of me, I also want to be surrounded by the best version of everyone else. I believe with all my heart that the best version of me will encourage a better version of those around me. Going back to my mantra, it also means that I have to be ok with letting go of the things, people, or habits that do not bring out the best in me. Not always easy. Not always the right time. A strong wind may come by and take a leaf or two off that little bud trying to push through before the roots and branches are strong enough to hold fast. Knowing and focusing on my why keeps me grounded.
In 2015, when I was discovering myself ????, I was surrounded by some of the best energy in some of the most positive and supportive people I’ve encountered in my professional life. One young lady in particular just seemed to ‘know’ her why every single day. When I tell you no matter what was happening she never lost sight of “I will smile and be pleasant and have fun today”. Every. Single. Day. Without fail, she greeted me and the world daily with “good morning sunshine!”. Huh? Who is capable of that everyday? I am not even certain that she has fully grasped the impact she has on those around her. THAT is what helped me to realize that I was weighed down with too many things that were not holding my interest, not making me happy, and not improving my life. A lot of it was self-inflicted and a lot of it was from outside forces like my job. I have spent my life helping and tending to others but I didn’t always experience joy. I often felt heavy and stripped of energy. So I set out to redefine how I help by defining why I help.
As I started to live according to my personal mantra (interest, happiness, betterment), my “what will get me up and sailing out the bed” became natural. Eventually, I understood what my next professional why should be. My passion for helping others never went away as my little green buds pushed through and I know that my skills and abilities ARE valuable to others. I can’t describe how I felt each time I thought of being a Personal Concierge to others. I just can’t. The excitement I felt. The possibilities I envision cannot adequately be expressed in words. I was certain that there are many others who need help to remove the weight of everyday stresses. I was certain that someone out there needs my help to find 5 minutes to breathe so he/she can explore his/her why. Maybe they already know their why and just cannot find the time to live it. Maybe they need a little extra time in their day/life to figure out their why. The bottom line is, when I help you live your why, I get to live mine!
Fast forward again to my chance encounter with Christy Wright (via her podcast that is LOL). I already knew my goal but she helped me frame my why. I have a gf who, whenever I give her a cool tip or pass on some app she now can’t live without, she always says “I could just smack you right on the lips” ????. Ok, smack as in a kiss, not violence and no, don’t bring anything other than thankful joy into that picture. Well man, that’s exactly how I felt the day I heard Christy’s podcast. It was so profound for me. Since then I have had the coolest journey launching and building SYBECA Services. It’s been a lot of long, hard hours and of course there will be long, hard hours and challenges ahead, but I have never been deterred by those. Comments from my clients such as “don’t know how I got on before you” and “you are peace-of-mind” validate my why.
Whether personal or professional, think about and know your why. But it’s not enough to simply ‘know’ your why, you also have to deliberately explore all aspects of your life based on that why. I promise, I promise, I promise. When you do that, things WILL become clearer. Do more of the things that align with your why and less of those things that don’t. Of course it’s not always going to be easy or simple, however, you have to try. Make trying to align your life with your why a priority, if not the #1 priority.
Find and know your why. Make purposeful decisions. Take deliberate actions. Live with intention.
Take 5. Breathe. Have a cuppa.